Cake Closed

no, seriously

As we start to settle into aught eight, and adjust to a new reality (maybe that's overstating it, but I feel different after That Speech), it's time to bid adieu to an old friend. Not somebody who was always there for you. Or one you could borrow money from when times were tight. But a guy who bought you a few beers, told some decent jokes and always marched to the beat of his own drummer.

That's right friends, I have a terminal disease.

Actually I don't, but I am 'sploding the Cake.

It served its purpose for a while, but Sumner forced me to neglect it -- leading to its ultimate demise.

Never fear, I'm leaving on two high notes.

-Hope springs eternal
-A little after the fact, but still in advance of Pazz and Jop, dj applesauce's Top 25 of 2007 (rank-ordered)

I'll see you motherfuckers in the future.

1/ Radiohead - In Rainbows
2/ Elvis Perkins - Ash Wednesday
3/ M.I.A. - Kala
4/ Amy Winehouse - Back to Black
5/ Interpol - Our Love to Admire
6/ The Shins - Wincing the Night Away
7/ Lil Wayne - Da Drought 3
8/ Arcade Fire - Neon Bible
9/ Spoon - GaGaGaGaGa
10/ Mark Ronson - Version
11/ Vampire Weekend - Vampire Weekend
12/ Beirut - The Flying Club Cup
13/ Feist - The Reminder
14/ Jay-Z - American Gangster
15/ Papercuts - Can't Go Back
16/ Kanye West - Graduation
17/ Band of Horses - Cease to Begin
18/ Bonde Do Role - With Lasers
19/ Common - Finding Forever
20/ Minus the Bear - Planet of Ice
21/ Ghostface Killah - Big Doe Rehab
22/ Cass McCombs - Dropping the Writ
23/ UGK - UGK
24/ Pharoahe Monch - Desire
25/ The National - Boxer

I Haven't Heard from You in a While - How You Doing?

Two songs (1, 2 -- thanks, dude) are profoundly affecting my life right now. Make that three.

Also:

• Kathryn Johnston, 92, is (was?) a FUCKING GANGSTER! Don't mean to make light of the situation, but this is a bit nuts.
• It's about time somebody started looking out for us white folks.
• Hot topic -- again, race related -- at UCLA right now.

Catching Up

In the last month I've...

• Masqueraded as Borat
• Mocked people openly
• Seen two Bears' wins
• Witnessed Kevin Smith passed out sleeping on the floor

No lie.

Marginally Inappropriate

If this is anybody but Dave Letterman, you're stealing my bit! Great idea. Fucking hilarious.

Well, Not Quite, But...

I'm first to admit that it's been slow going here at the Cake Factory. My staff abandoned me. Overhead tripled. Stinkin' kids are always crying, "we haven't eaten all week." And there are other things -- which happen at night, in the dark, while I'm indisposed -- that I can't comment on. But I've got a moment here, so imma catch up on lost time:

• Happy birthday (yesterday), Greasy Kid!
• This happen a while ago, but I'm just as fascinated with it now as I was then. This is fucking brilliant! Note to self: meet Corbin Bernsen.
• Harcore political analysis and group sex? Sign me up.
• The new TV on the Radio is incredibly addictive. "Wolf Like Me" is blowing up my playlist something wicked.
• Most won't appreciate this clip, but if it connects with even just one netizen, I've done my job.
• Speaking of my job -- there's a crazy story behind this episode, ask me about it sometime. I know it doesn't take much to make Grease cry, but I got him on this one. It's related to this.
• I think this may happen to Alex at the Woodies.
• Just because.
  

Whoo Whoo

In a big way.

The Tubes are Making Rock Stars

Maybe it's just because I'm professionally connected to this whole big bowl of strawberry jello, but I'm fascinated by viral video success stories. Here's one of the latest, and it's remarkable even for YouTube, which cranks out several a week.