Happiness is...

• a Bears win on Christmas Day
• a Packers loss
• the NFC North crown
• a first round bye
• SCOREBOARD
• eat it Greasy Kid!!

A Proud Day for New Mexico's Judicial System

Guh?

:CreepyDude:

Not sure what's prompted it -- maybe the big breakup news? -- but recently I've been musing on how creepy Joe Simpson is. At the same time, I feel indebted to dude for engendering stuff like this, and, umm, this*. Kind of a wash, I suppose.

*Please note: BuildCake is not going Pr0Nblog, so don't be disappointed or (more likely) get excited.

Where my motherfucking midweezer peoples at?!?? I'm in your district Dec 23 - Jan 2. Don't be a stranger.

W.A.T.G. XVI

Draped Up and Dripped Out

Speak! -- super "honest" track; interesting perspective. I've always respected Bun as an elder statesman of dirty south g-rap, but only recently has it become clear what level his chops are on. Dude really knows how to own the mic, and when you hear him beside new school gumpas, his skills are that much more obvious. He shines all over Trill. This is expertly delivered syrup-sipping lyricism over trunk-rattling beats. SFJ concurs.

In Your Face, Suburbs

I betcha they don't find shit like this digging up space for a new mini mall.

Which one of the Golden Girls do you want to bang the most?

Come on... you know you have a fantasy favorite.

W.A.T.G. XV

Flying Too Close to the Sun on Wings of Pastrami Dept.

5 mics. Really?

It's really quite a shame. To go from being the voice of a movement and subculture to a total laughing stock. They brought it on themselves though. It's striking to see it all laid out on one page.

Question: If Jigga were to take over the franchise, do you think he could breathe life into it and re-establish The Source's credibility?

Cold Turkey

I'm quitting people.

You - must - learn

"In a corner of the class, high above the lockers, another well-known graffiti artist, Rate, had drawn huge, elliptical rats, which have become his calling card. Asked where he usually painted them, the artist, a thin young man wearing a baseball cap, smiled and did not exactly answer the question."

At first, I was afraid this article was gonna document something like this old song and dance. Thankfully, I was wrong. Proper!

Those Wacky Japanese Redux

Here's a reason to care about the environment: warm, fuzzy Japanese boobies!

Bringing 95 Back

Oh my. This new Wu Tang / Indie comp is major. They've channeled that Cuban Linx / Liquid Swords-era Wu Tang Sound and married it with some of today's dopest underground emcees. Ras Kass is back with a vengeance. GZA spits darts. RZA and Doom on a track together -- how did this not happen years ago?? Oh. Anyway, it's outstanding this all coalesced. I'm only a few listens in, but this album has quickly become a serious contender for top 3 of 2005.

The miracle of birth

Really, who gets contracted as the illustrator for books like this? I guess you don't want your kid learning where babies come from on the street.

gosh...

Somewhat appropriate that we occasionally actually reference the movie. I guess...

Greasy Kid Inc. Top 10: 11.10.05

You should know that all of us at GKI are totally committed to identifying and cultivating renewable resources. We care about the future of the planet and are also big fans of numbered lists -- and roman numerals. As our last attempt to implement a re-occurring installment didn't work out so well, we decided to try again. Bigger. Better. With more 'tude. And also offering something of value!

Sorry kids, it's late and been a hell of a week -- kind of delirious. Lots to learn and absorb at the new gig. Puts a crimp in my gangster blogger style. So I've bitten the bullet and substituted volume for frequency, at least for the short term. Peep game!

Will do this every once in a while. Try and keep the list to more recent releases, because we don't need to tell you that songs off Boxcar Sessions and Illmatic and Step in the Arena and Unknown Pleasures are good. You should know that already. Or you probably shouldn't be here.

dj applesauce is for the children.

Here goes:

10/ “Brand New” – Rhymefest w/ Kanye West

This isn’t a particularly remarkable song, but it’s catchy and feels like a 12” I would have been really juiced to find and put on a mixtape in 1996. The ‘themsmykinfolk’ back and forth between Rhymefest and Kanye is fun and it’s good to see they’ve put their beef to bed. It’s also bugged to hear a Kanye beat that isn’t all operatic and/or doesn’t feature a sped up vocal sample from an old soul 45. But just like them ‘ol jawns, the overused “brand new” punch-in is guaranteed to get lodged in your brain.

Choice line: “Ralph Lauren was boring before I wore him”

9/ “Right Now” – Devin tha Dude

I’ve only recently dug into Devin’s catalog, but I’m feeling the slow syrupy production that’s all over his long players. This particular tune caught my ear right away: lots of low end, just enough high hat, some sparse, tinkling piano, and an ill ass acoustic guitar loop. Dude rides the beat just right and even pulls off an enjoyable quasi-sung chorus. Makes me want to chief an o of presidential and catch the next flight to someplace sunny and warm.

Choice line: “I said aiight bitch, but I said it kinda low / didn’t want no problems, so towards the back I go / I had a little weed on me, didn’t want it to show / some helicopter: took my potna three months to grow.”

8/ “Trap or Die” – Young Jeezy w/ Bun B

Oh shit, it’s the trapper of the year! Man, if Jeezy isn’t the most legitimate, on the g-est motherfucker rapping right now, I don’t know who is. He’s no where near being anything special with the verbals, but he’s got a gang of charisma, presence and always manages to, ummm, “manage” the verse. He couples up nicely with Bun B on “Trap or Die” over some decent upper register synth work and 10 dump trucks full of bass. I’m this close to buying an Expedition, filling it with 14s, bumping this track all day and starting a career in narcotic sales.

Choice line: Bun B’s whole verse (and flow) is sick as hell.

7/ “List of Demands (Reparations)” – Saul Williams

I’ve always kind of dug Saul Williams, but never fully. However, this song plopped on my radar recently and really endeared me to homeboy. It’s loud, aggressive and kinda like a Bjork song gone horribly awry (in a good way). There’s more chorus than verse, and his inflection is kind of annoying in parts, but he’s just so god damn into it, I dig it anyway.

Choice line: “I aint afraid of you! I’m just a victim of your fear / [you’re] a coward in your tower hoping that I disappear.”

6/ “Have a Good Life” – Sadat X

This tune is a happy combination of rolling, stuttered bassline, warm horn blasts and metal bars hit with soft mallets. Much like the rest of Experience and Education, it pays homage to the golden age that birfed Dat X, but it still sounds current and relevant. This is a tough thing to do, and it’s a big part of why I respect this track and album so much. Support my boy Peter Agoston and his label Female Fun and PURCHASE this rekkid.

Choice line: “Yo I’m living in the apple / where the cost of livin’ / is so unforgiven / I’m still good for a quote / I’m still good for a mean sixteen”

5/ “Not Enough” – Little Brother

Here’s a hot track off LBs most recent and quite toasty full length. I think the album loses a bit towards the end, but this is one of several load bearing songs helping to properly boost up the first half. The joint is vintage Ninth, with a driving bassline, some offset snare kicks, and mean Teddy Pendergrass-sounding “oooowoooooooh”s interspersed throughout.

Choice line: “Yo I aint never heard an act to blow and go global / and come back home and still be called local / and when we on stage, the people they all front / dope beats, dope rhymes what more do y’all want?”

4/ “Crosshairs” – Dangerdoom

It’s a different experience to hear Dumile over such a polished beat, but this shit is polished something righteous. Something like a…nicely varnished cane? Inside joke. Anyway, stumble upon “Crosshairs” and you’ll find a twangy guitar fresh out of a 'Roots of the Blues' boxed set, situated handsomely next to some strings, flute and xylophone. Please Dangermouse, don’t hurt ‘em! Doom, you’re my fucking hero.

Choice line: “Pelican, with some very soft mangos / closet full of skeletons and terrycloth Kangols”

3/ “Banquet” – Bloc Party

Well, I’m about seven months late to Bloc Party’s Silent Alarm, but this album is ROCKING MY FUCKING ASS OFF right now. “Banquet” in particular. The drums drive and pang, but don’t overpower. The dueling lead guitars and their respective chords fit right where they should. Kele Okereke is out in front, over-singing a little, but ultimately getting the job done well. Great single.

Choice line: n/a

2/ “The Skin of My Yellow Country Yellow Teeth” – Clap Your Hands Say Yeah

Here’s another indie rock single I’m gaga for right now. It starts all electronic, like TV on the Radio, but quickly folds in a moving, Modest Mousey-style harmony. Dude on the drums is capable, but lead vocalist Alec Ounsworth is the real star. He belts out his lines with a wink, a nod and a crack in his voice that is simultaneously self effacing and brimming with chutzpah. This record is pretty dope from reel to reel. Pick it up, pick it up.

Choice line: n/a

1/ “Welcome to Jamrock” – Damian Marley

Absolutely my joint right now. Clean version, then dirty version, then instrumental. Sometimes I’ll even play it a couple more times before I put something else on the platter. “Out in thah street, they call it murdaaaaaaah!” Nicely timed dubs – and an even nicer dub siren! Gong Jr. flexes great cadence and once again makes “Marley” a name of note in contemporary Jamaican music.

Choice line: “Come on let’s face it, a ghetto education’s basic / an most ah dey yout dem waste it / and when dem waste it, dat’s when dem take the guns replace it / an dem don’t stand a chance at all”

See you next time folkers.

W.A.T.G. XIV

Best. This Guy. Yet.

Word Builder Vol. 1

Today's word of the day is "flummoxed". Flummoxed means confused. It's really just a fancy way of saying confused. I encourage you all to talk in fancy language whenever you can.

I'll do this word of the day thing every once in a while. Not so much as to become annoying, but just enough to be a public service. Say word.

W.A.T.G. XIII

Halloween was fun.

U.N.I.T.Y.

Awww. Sounds like it was a hot show.

"Ass Like a Ten Year Old Boy"

Creepy.

Climb

This show is going to make my career.

Monday Morning Sundry

• 'Attaway, boys! Cheat, scrap, do whatever you gotta do to bring another championship to the Windy. Exciting stuff.
• Killah Cam gets caught up -- oh boy! Watch yourself, fam. As Ed opinioned yesterday afternoon, "Can't he just drive a regular S.U.V. like everybody else?"
• Feeling The Minstrel Show something wicked right now. Didn't really grab me by the balls right away, but it does well in repeat listens. Super soulful beats and Phonte has a respectable presence. Some say all Ninth's stuff sounds the same, and I agree: it's all hitting right now.
• Also very pleased with Knockout Ned's latest. There's some heartbreaking shit on there. Cop that business, dunlevys.

Found in Translation

Arabic is a language fond of formal indirectness, and, during the first planning sessions of the Arab-language edition of "The Apprentice," the producers decided to replace "You're fired!" -- Donald Trump's catchphrase of blunt humiliation -- with a line that translates into English as "May God be kind to you."

--The New Yorker, October 17, 2005

So, wait, do they or don't they hate our freedom? I'm so confused!

W.A.T.G. XII / Absentia

Hey, look at that! It's a funny looking guy.

In other news, apologies for the lag in posting here, but my (our?) attention has been railroaded the past week or so. There's this thing, and then there was The Cake summit this past weekend. Anyway, all positive stuff. We'll be back with fresh content soon. Stay tuned!

When a Brand Name is an Adjective

"It's Comcastic"?!?? How the fuck are they going to try and brand this? I'm offended as a consumer, lover of words AND a marketer.

More Blue, Less White

The new 49ers. Interesting stuff. Situations like this are rare and becoming rarer in today's hyper mapped out and spoken for earth. Check the capitalist perspective, too:

"It's the positive side of global warming, if there is a positive side," said
Ron Lemieux, the transportation minister of Manitoba.

W.A.T.G. XI

He is a sad guy.

IN/TIME

IT WOULD HAVE BEEN DOPE if it was just one of them. But it wasn't just one of them. It was all three of them. Two of the world's best djs and a producer at the top of his game. On stage at the same time. And complimented by a cat that played with Jimmy Smith and Marvin, a cat that gigged with Herbie and Refa (among others), and a dude zero degrees removed from Jorge Ben. These are the ingredients for an incredible live performance.

And so it went! Layers of rich, happy, Brazilian sound washed over the crowd for just shy of two hours. Humphry absolutely owned that drum set without a break or hitch -- never missed a beat. Reklaw would finish an amazing flute solo, then pick up a sax and be deep in it before 16 bars had passed. Cut Chemist and J-Rocc chirped and flared and crabbed and knew exactly when to jump in and just when to lay back and cede the floor to the other contributors. Madlib showed that he's come along way on those keys. So much so that I actually really want to hear a new YNQ album now.

A few years ago, I would have been naive enough to scribble out a blow-by-blow, 4,000 word account of what happen at Spirit on Sunday, October 2nd, and think that maybe folks would be able to get an understanding of what went down. But now I know better. So I'll just strongly recommend you purchase this and hope you get the chance to experience this live for yourself some day. Fly long distances. Bribe people. Forfeit the baseball cards your grandpa gave you as a kid. I promise you won't regret it.

America's Wang

Brilliant. Man, Americans are steady on some take it too far shit.

Warning!

Do you know who your children are playing baseball with?

Falk asked the driver to pull over at the entrance to Sing Sing, the prison. “The school used to bring the ball team here to play the inmates,” he said.

W.A.T.G. X

Not quite sure what's going on there.

Because I'm more Coldplay than I am Ice-T

Oh. My. God. (credit: Kay-Dee)

The Wussiest Wuss Rock Band that Ever Rocked ('cept Dumbwaiter -- aye!)

But they do know how to cut a rekkid. The new jawn is pretty compelling. On par with Transatlanticism. I wonder if they make bank off having tunes on the O.C.?

BTW, more cogent thoughts coming on about 6 other recent and upcoming releases. Just haven't had the time to sit down and put pen to paper, or fingers to keyboard, as it were. To prove my gangsterism, one of 'em is Jeezy. This heater makes me want to break and steal things!

The Male Uniform

When was it exactly that “fashion” became something that meant anything to men? I mean, that entails some sort of work. Traditionally, a simple T-shirt with a logo or phrase that supported something we were into cut the mustard. Now, if you’ve left the house in the last few years and gone anywhere with a crowd, it’s quite evident that we’ve adopted some of the same ideals as women when it comes to dress. You know, the “Male Uniform.” The key is an untucked button up cotton/polyester blend long-sleeved dress shirt. Don’t button the cuffs and leave two or three of the top chest buttons undone. Perfect. Now throw on some fitting jeans, some dress shoes (make sure they match your belt, son!) and toss a palm of goop in your hair. Now you’re part of the army. The go out to get drunk and chase pussy army where sloppy is supposed to look sophisticated. It’s a rather unelite club because all you have to do to join is have a dick and dress this way. This is pretty much the standard get-up now with all these wanna-be metrosexuals (and I don’t like using that word, it’s WAY too Maxim/Men’s Health). I guess I’m just disappointed to see guys voluntarily dismiss their individualism. You’ve got to wonder if a girl will ever be able to pick you out of the crowd now. How are you supposed to stand out above the rest of these fools out there with the same motives? There’s no point of difference anymore, so you best get a really dope car or actually have a personality. Most guys just shit some cheese-dick garble out of their mouth. And that does work at times. Throw enough shit at the wall, and some of it is going to stick. Why not.

W.A.T.G. IX

1s and 2s Dept.

Come check me out on Thursday. At 9:30 pm. Here.

As Inevitable As a Hangover From The Hurricane Cocktail

Where was Nostradamus on this one? Looks like Neo Geo had the edge since this was published October 2004. Sure it's science and all, but it's interesting to see it predicted like this.

No, No, Yes?

Ok, that makes sense.


I can’t see this being a huge problem, but it must be serious enough to warrant its own sign.


But it’s okay to hang out the window of a rapidly moving tram car?

?

Things Realized, Decided or Reaffirmed

• Walking around everyday checking out new shit and drinking beers in the afternoon is where it's at. I gotta find some way to make a career out of this.
  

• It's highly likely I'll marry a woman of Eastern European descent.

• This album is aging exceptionally well. This one, too.

• Cam'ron kinda murders this "Dreams" beat (credit: hardly art, hardly garbage).

• I remember thinking when I first heard "Verbal Intercourse" that it was a pretty major song. Now it sounds fucking seminal. I believe that if you played this for a room full of heads right now, folks would absolutely lose their shit.

• Ed's on to something with that Kafka kick.

• The whole world hates us. Because we're ugly. They're on to something, too.

• This hurricane business is BUGGED OUT. I was really disconnected there for a stretch and had no idea how bad it was projected to be or what the immediate conditions were. The first piece I read detailed feces and rape in the Superdome. Come again??
  


• It's wild to observe significant US happenings through a foreign lens. I don't know when the press here began opining it, but the European media was all over the Kyoto shit right away.

• Budapestians really know how to live.

• FOOTBALL.

• The critics are still raving!

• Public service announcement from Greasy Kid Incorporated: The next joint will be called dj applesauce - Put'cha Breaks On. Coming this fall.
  

Homecoming

My Polska, my people! My wonderful, humble, resilient Polish people. We've been bullied around Europe for more than 1,000 years. They wiped out nearly a fifth of us during WWII. But we're still here, still repping that white, red and eagle.

My people! Of sour complexion, largely due to a diet that'll guarantee you maybe 50sumyears of existence. My brethren, with squared jaws and cursed hair (so that's where it comes from!). My sistren -- tall, stoic, ample bosomed and frequently with a sexy little ponch. Blond and fair in the north, darker featured and 'more Slavic' in the south. My folk!

A humble people. We never had the grand aspirations of the Dutch or Spanish, comrades to the east, or demonic neighbors to the west. Muhfuckas was just trying to live! Till the land of 'em. Have a comfortable little life. But heads kept treading on us. The map grew and shrank, but mostly shrank. It even disappeared.

But we don't die, all we fucking do is multiply. Fam came back. Survived 40 years of stifling economic repression. Sewed the seeds of revolution. And now -- on a come up!

Anyway, shit's been major. Defining. A love affair. A hajj. I've seen a fair amount of this earth, but nothing has affected me quite like this. You all will lose me to this joint for a while at some point. Just have to sort out the details.

Kocham was, Polska!

W.A.T.G. VIII

This is my cat. Although he's had dozens of names throughout his life, the one that stuck most is Barney. Let it be known, I am not a cat person. I was merely forced to live with him because my sister abandoned his sorry ass. I guess he's cool and all, but I can't fully respect any creature that religiously sneaks outside, eats as much grass as he can before getting caught, then pukes it all up within 30 minutes of returning inside. Not only that, but he refuses to vomit on anything but carpet. God forbid he huck the unchewed grass up on the easy-to-clean tile. Above and beyond that, he's not such a bad roommate.

It's a celebration, bitches!

Off to go connect with the motherland -- Schmessers and Danasauce: don't break 'nothing while I'm gone!

The Corpse Pimper

Oh man. Dude is rarely even in my realm of consciousness anymore. I typically forget he even exists. But then he goes and does some stupid shit like this...and people care! And granted it's E! Online. But still.

I can't help but think this guy has a karmic debt big enough to sink Mother Theresa.

This post filed under "bitching about rappers" (that's a preemptive dick cookie for you haters).

Wait, that sounds too salty. What I meant to say was: I *heart* all off you Cake eaters!

W.A.T.G. VII

¡Baile!

Fock, Carlos. At least to my untrained ears, this shit sounds pretty mega. It's a nice compliment to oppressive heat, though current status feels more like Mumbai than San Juan.

Annals of economics

Damn summer malaise. You know it's a slow day when I'm posting crap like this. This just in: quantity demanded outstrips quantity supplied!

Mmmmmmmm. Beer phone.

Wilted flowers

I really dig the character Bill Murray has morphed into the past several years, especially the way Wes Anderson has used him in his last few films. So I went into Broken Flowers with high expectations. Unfortunately, I found it to be much more this than this.

I'm a big fan of movies with not a lot of plot and very few 'splosions, but this flick draaaaaaaaags entirely too much. It's my understanding that Jarmusch has used sparse dialogue to great effect in previous efforts (I'll admit I'm in arrears on his catalog), however, here it's just boring. There are some very funny parts, especially the frames with Sharon Stone, and the score is top notch. Overall, a very under-whelming experience though. You can safely wait for the DVD.